Too many of his former friends would know how Jane treated him now, how his life had changed utterly; how he was living the life of a baby girl aged two and a bit.
It would be impossible to walk in through those doors ever again, even if somehow he became able to live the life of a man and husband again. He wondered if Mummy would come soon, sucking on the dummy that was clipped to his little short pink nightie with a plastic clip and cuddling his pink rabbit gave him a secure feeling.
He wondered if Jane’s new boyfriend was a member, did they discuss him and his baby status with others in public? His hands drifted down the bed he felt the comfort of the frilly pink satin lined plastic pants, the large 60 inch square terry nappy held on with four nappy pins, inside that was a Tena maxi disposable that only occasionally leaked into the terry. He felt better now as he reflected that he did not think Jane had slept with the new man of her life that night, he had not had to listen in an agony of frustration, hurt and pain to their lovemaking in the bedroom next door.
Normally Jane’s orgasmic cries seemed to go on for ever, building crescendo after crescendo before subsiding down to murmur only to start again a little later with renewed intensity.
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He was safe in his cot; the golf club was a distant memory not to be seen again soon.
He didn’t even know if he was still a member; that was a stupid thought.
In his former life as a husband his attempts in the marital bed had been shallow, quick and totally unexciting for Jane.