Falling for the Instant Relationship works against you in several ways: first, it blinds you to potential red flags.When you narrow your focus to one guy like this, you end up committing yourself to him before you know important things about him. Follow his lead and get to know him It means that the best thing for you is to do the very same thing a guy does.And it definitely could be…if you keep a few things in mind about how men approach dating: Understand that his pace if different from yours When it comes to dating and commitment, men usually operate on a much different – and slower – time scale than women.
He needs time to feel comfortable with you, let down his guard, and start seeing you as a part of his life. Just keeping this in mind will save you a lot of angst when a guy isn’t “moving things along” the way you think he should.
Avoid jumping to conclusions, and pushing him away A lot of women don’t approach early dates this way, though – they feel intense chemistry with a man, and they think “this is it.” So, instead of merely enjoying those first few dates and being present in the moment, they’re already acting like they’re in a relationship. I call this the “Instant Relationship” – it’s what happens when you assume that you two are a sure item too soon.
) So, even though guys do weird things, this is one instance where you should follow a guy’s lead.
Treat those early stages of dating just like a man: take your time, have fun, and look out for you.
But the thing is, if you continue to invest your time and energy in these stories, you will remain a victim. What if you could see yourself as one who is learning to love with the training wheels on? You’ll find it as your beloved doggie tries to distract you with squiggles as you attempt to practice yoga, or when a friend texts you as you’re busy trying to write. Remember, you’ve got training your wheels on 🙂 Don’t wait for some kind of perfect timing when you feel you’ve got yourself more together.
There is never a better time than right now to jump into the pool of love.
Eventually, I am able to speak to the biggest challenge of all: the ego self that’s often involved in the process. If you are pushing something away, you are inviting it to stay. I want her to be young because it always seems like spiritual people aren’t young. I always get the ones who are too set in their beliefs. It seems like a good idea to stay vigilant about what you don’t want so you can ward off of any future dating evils. They seem to feel inferior, insecure, and envious; sometimes they’re overly impressed by it all.
For many, it is completely running the show: tallying those wins and losses, coming up with little rituals to ward off evil, trying to keep us safe, and spinning stories about who we are in the game of love. Often when I ask people: what are you looking for in a partner? –Michael Singer, The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself When you say things like: He shouldn’t be intimidated by my success. You wonder if you’ll ever meet someone who can handle it and just appreciate you for you.
Remember the original list of objections and issues? I feel confident that love IS coming for you and I dare you to be excited about it too. You might not know when, where, or how but you do know it is coming. Thanks so much my friend I hope this supports you and unknown and amazing ways.